It has been more than a year since I have written on this topic. It’s crazy how fast time flies (when you’re having fun.) As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, being a single parent isn’t easy. For those who say it is, they have help such as nannies or some type of caretaker to assist with juggling parenting responsibilities. My boys have never been much to handle and I am grateful for that. However, it is my overthinking that is getting in the way.
Since my youngest was born, I have been preparing my speech on why his dad and I are no longer together. Back story, if you haven’t been following or just now reading the blog for the first time, I left my ex-husband 5 years ago with my two boys (ages 5 and 6 months), and moved across the country. Until about two years ago, their father came into their life. At his new school they have been talking quite a bit about family and family structures. The traditional family structure of having a mom, dad, kids, etc., but they do not go beyond that. There so many non-traditional families they do cover, but that is for a different time.
My youngest has never really brought up why we are not together, but with all this talk at his school. He finally asked. I was prepared to tell this long, drawn out story and even had resources used from the family counseling session I attended to go through the divorce process. When I tell you I was ready, I was READY. So he asked the question and I explained for 60 seconds, he was like “oh okay, coo!” and ran off. Now I know he is 5 and has a short attention span, but all that over thinking I was doing stressed me out and wasn’t necessary. I know he doesn’t truly understand, but he understands more than I thought and was able to comprehend what I told him.
It made me think about all the things I try to prepare for in life. Shit happens and things do not go as planned. No need to overthink or stress about it, I just need to move on from it. As a parent we do the best we can to explain things to our kids so that they have an understanding, but we tend to overthink the process on how or what to communicate to them. They are just happy you are spending the time to talk with them. Quality time is the best time.
Love Life and full of smiles,